Hi, everybody. This is your cousin Brucie. Whoa!
Our summer romances are in full bloom, and everybody's in love!
So cousins, here's a great song from the Four Seasons.
That was the summer of 1963...
when everybody called me ""Baby"" and it didn't occur to me to mind.
That was before President Kennedy was shot...
before the Beatles came...
when I couldn't wait to join the Peace Corps...
and I thought I'd never find a guy as great as my dad.
That was the summer we went to Kellerman's.
Ping-Pong in the west arcade, softball in the east diamond.
All you Sandy Koufaxes, get out there!
Complimentary dance lessons in the gazebo.
Oh, my God. Look at that!
Mom, I should've brought the coral shoes. You said I was taking too much.
Well, sweetheart, you brought ten pairs.
But the coral shoes matched that dress.
This is not a tragedy.
A tragedy is three men trapped in a mine or police dogs used in Birmingham.
Monks burning themselves in protest.
Butt out, Baby.
Okay, we got horseshoes on the south lawn in 15 minutes!
We've got splish-splash the water class down by the lake.
We have the still life art class. We got volleyball and croquet.
And for you older folks, we got sacks!
Doc!
Max!
Doc, after all these years I finally got you up on my mountain.
How's the blood pressure?
I want you girls to know...
if it were not for this man, I'd be standing here dead.
- Billy, get the bags. - Right away, Doc.
I kept the best cabin for you and your beautiful girls.
Hey, thanks a lot.
You want a job here?
There's a merengue class in the gazebo in the next few minutes.
The greatest teacher. Used to be a Rockette.
It's his first real vacation in six years, Max. Take it easy.
Three weeks here, it'll feel like a year.
One, two, three, four! Stomp those grapes and stomp some more!
One, two, three, four! Listen to the music!
Sorry.
Move your caboose and shake it loose!
One, two, three, four! Start the train!
Come on, men! Follow me into a round robin!
Ladies, the inner circle!
Come on, ladies!
God wouldn't have given you maracas if he didn't want you to shake them!
Okay now, ladies, when I say ""stop""...
you're gonna find the man of your dreams.
Stop!
Remember, he's the boss on the dance floor, if nowhere else.
Mom, Dad, I'm going up to the main house to look around.
There are two kinds of help here.
You waiters are all college guys...
and I went to Harvard and Yale to hire you.
And why did I do that? Why?
I shouldn't have to remind you. This is a family place.
That means you keep your fingers out of the water, hair out of the soup...
and show the goddamn daughters a good time.
All the daughters.
Even the dogs.
Schlepp 'em out to the terrace, show 'em the stars.
- Romance 'em any way you want. - Got that, guys?
Hey, hold it! Hold it.
Well, if it isn't the entertainment staff.
Listen, wise ass, you got your own rules.
Dance with the daughters. Teach 'em the mambo...
the cha-cha, anything they pay for.
That's it.
That's where it ends.
No funny business, no conversations, and keep you hands off!
It's the same at all these places. Some ass in the woods, but no conversation.
Watch it, Rodriguez.
Can you keep that straight, Johnny? What you can't lay your hands on?
Just put your pickle on everybody's plate, and leave the hard stuff to me.
Sit down and I'll get you some wine.
Thank you, Max.
This is Dr. and Mrs. Houseman.
Baby, Lisa, this is your waiter, Robbie Gould.
Yale medical school.
These people are my special guests. Give them anything they want.
- Enjoy. - Thanks, Max.
Oh, look at all this leftover food. Are there still starving children in Europe?
- Try Southeast Asia, Ma. - Right.
Robbie, Baby wants to send her leftover pot roast...
to Southeast Asia, so anything you don't finish, wrap up.
Max, our Baby's gonna change the world.
- And what are you gonna do, Missy? - Oh Lisa's gonna decorate it.
She already does.
Doc, I want you to meet someone. My grandson Neil.
Goes to the Cornell School of Hotel Management.
Baby's starting Mount Holyoke in the fall.
Oh, great.
Are you going to major in English?
No. Economics of underdeveloped countries.
- I'm going into the Peace Corps. - After the final show...
I'm going to Mississippi with a couple of busboys, freedom ride.
This is our own Tito Suarez.
Mambo! Yeah! Come on!
Who's that?
Oh, them. They're the dance people.
They're here to keep the guests happy.
They shouldn't show off with each other. That's not gonna sell lessons.
- Hi, kids. Having fun? - Yeah.
Actually, I've gotta excuse myself. I'm in charge of the games tonight.
Would you like to help me get things started?
Sure she would.
This'll only hurt for a minute. You've got Blue Cross, right?
Was that good for you?
And for being such a good sport, here you go!
I finally met a girl exactly like my mother.
Dresses like her, acts like her. So I brought her home.
My father doesn't like her!
Go figure.
- Hi. - How'd you get here?
- I was taking a walk. - Go back.
Let me help you. What's up there?
No guests allowed. House rules.
Why don't you go back to the playhouse? I saw you dancing with little boss man.
Can you keep a secret?
Your parents would kill you.
Max would kill me.
Where'd they learn to do that?
Where?
I don't know. Kids are doing it in their basements back home.
Wanna try it?
Come on, Baby.
Can you imagine dancing like this on the main floor...
home of the family fox-trot?
Max would close the place down first.
That's my cousin, Johnny Castle.
He got me the job here.
- They look great together. - Yeah.
You'd think they were a couple, wouldn't you?
- Aren't they? - No, not since we were kids.
Do you love me?
Yo, cousin, what's she doing here?
She came with me. She's with me.
I carried a watermelon.
I carried a watermelon?
Bend your knees. Down.
Watch. Watch my eyes.
Good.
That's better.
Good. Now roll this way.
Now watch.
Look.
Love man!
Ladies, join our hair-raising wig show.
Try your Sandra Dee, Jackie Kennedy...
or Elizabeth Taylor-Cleopatra wig.
- I'll knock with three. - Look at that cute fella.
Look at these hands. They're golden hands.
My God, it's Cleopatra! I feel like such an ""asp"".
You look ten years younger.
At 10:.15, by the pool, we have calisthenics.
Then on the west porch, we have a symposium by Rabbi Maurice Sherman...
on the psychology of insult comedians.
So I say, ""Ask not what your waiter can do for you...
but what you can do for your waiter.""
If tips keep up, I'll have enough for my Alfa Romeo.
That's my favorite car.
Ladies, you look very lovely.
Baby, would you cover for me tonight? Tell Mom and Dad I went to lie down.
Where are you going?
To the golf course. There's a pretty view from the first tee.
Good. Thanks.
So you were really a Rockette?
I think you're a wonderful dancer.
Yeah? Well, my mother kicked me out when I was 16.
I've been dancing ever since. It's the only thing I ever wanted to do anyway.
I envy you.
- Aren't you dancing, Doc? - We're waiting for a waltz.
Hi, Max. Aren't my dance lessons starting to pay off?
You look great, Vivian! Terrific!
That's Vivian Pressman, one of the bungalow bunnies.
That's what we call the women who stay here all week.
The husbands only come up on weekends.
Moe Pressman's a big card player. He'll join our game.
- Moe coming up on Friday? - Friday.
He's away a lot. I know.
It's a hardship.
Where's Penny? Everybody's been asking for her.
What do you mean, where's Penny? She's taking a break. She needs a break.
As long as it's not an all-night break.
Come on, doll. Let's take a walk.
I love to watch your hair blowing in the breeze.
Maybe my parents are looking for me.
Baby, don't worry.
If they think you're with me, they'll be the happiest parents at Kellerman's.
I have to say it.
- I'm known as the catch of the county. - I'm sure you are.
Last week I took a girl away from Jamie, the lifeguard.
And he said to her, right in front of me, ""What does he have that I don't have?""
And she said, ""Two hotels.""
Robbie.
I don't hear an apology.
Go back to Mommy and Daddy and listening, Lisa. Maybe you'll hear one in your dreams.
I'm sorry you had to see that.
Sometimes in this world...
you see things you don't wanna see.
You hungry?
Come on.
So, Baby, what do you want? You can have anything you want.
A brownie, some milk...
Ieftover rice pudding, beets...
leftover cabbage roll...
fruit salad, sweet gherkins?
Neil, look, I'm sorry. I better go check on Lisa.
Yeah.
- Why's she here? - I brought her incase Neil comes back.
Penny just doesn't think.
She wouldn't do anything stupid, would she?
So, what's wrong? What's the matter with her?
- She's knocked up, Baby. - Billy!
- What's he gonna do about it? - ""What's he gonna do about it?""
It's mine, right?
- Right away you think it's mine. - But I thought...
It's okay. Johnny's here. It's okay.
I'm never gonna let anything happen to you.
We got to go.
Just hold on. Just hold on.
Good girl. Good girl.
What do you think you're doing? You're in trouble, you talk to me.
I'll take care of it.
You should've come to me in the first place.
Forget it, Johnny. I'm not taking what's left of your salary.
- Penny, that's my business. - Besides, it wouldn't be enough.
Oh, God, it's hopeless!
Don't say that.
There's gotta be a way to work it out.
Baby? Is that your name?
Well, you know what, Baby?
You don't know shit about my problems.
I told her.
Jesus! She's gonna tell her little management boyfriend and then we'll all get fired.
Why not skywrite it? ""Penny got knocked up by Robbie, the creep.""
- Robbie?! - Look-- - No, Baby.
One of the counselors knows a doctor, a real M.D....
just traveling through New Paltz one day next week.
We can get an appointment, but it costs her $250.
But if it's Robbie, there's no problem. I know he has the money.
- I'm sure if you tell him-- - He knows.
Go back to your playpen ... Baby.
- And just where do you get off telling me what's right? - But you can't just leave her. I mean ..
I didn't blow a summer hauling toasted bagels just to bail out some chick...
who probably ball every guy in the place.
A little precision please, baby.
Some people count and some people don't.
Read it.
I think you'll enjoy it. But return it. I have notes in there.
You make me sick. Stay away from me.
Stay away from my sister or I'll have you fired.
What am I doing wrong?
You're lining it up a little wrong, Marge.
If your mother ever leaves me, it'll be for Arnold Palmer.
- Daddy, someone's in trouble. - Besides your mother?
You're overcorrecting, Marge.
You always told me if someone was in trouble, I should help.
Could you lend me $250?
Are you all right? Are you in some kind of trouble?
No, it's not for me. Could you loan it to me?
That's a lot of money. What's it for?
Baby, stand up straight.
I can't tell you.
It's hard for me to say that to you, but I can't.
You always said you could tell me anything.
I can't tell you this.
It's not illegal, is it?
No, Daddy.
That was a stupid thing to ask. Forgive me.
I'll have it for you before dinner.
- Is everything all right? - Fine.
Thanks, Daddy.
Here's the money.
- You mean Robbie? - No. You were right about him?
- Then where'd you get it? - You said you needed it.
- Is this kid for real? - Takes a real saint to ask Daddy.
Thanks, Baby, but I can't use it.
What? What's the matter with you? You should take the money.
I can only get her an appointment for Thursday.
They do their act at the Sheldrake Thursday.
If they cancel, they lose this season's salary and next year's gig.
What's the Sheldrake?
It's another hotel where they do their mambo act.
Can't someone else fill in?
No, ""Miss Fix-it."" Somebody else can't.
Maria has to work all day. She can't learn the routines.
And Janet has to fill in for Penny. Everybody works here.
You wanna do it? Take time out from ""Simon Says""?
It's not a bad idea.
It was a 5oke.
- She can move. - It's the dumbest idea I ever heard of.
- I can't even do the merengue. - See?
You're a strong partner. You can lead anybody.
She can't even do the merengue. She cannot do it.
- No! - Oh, sorry. Sorry.
You don't step on the one.
You gotta start on the two. Find the two. Understand?
-I never did any of these dances before. -It's one, two, three, four.
When the music starts, you don't dance until the two. Got it?
Relax, relax.
Breathe.
Frame.
Nope.
Again.
Ow.
Two, three, four. Two, three, four.
Don't lean back. Lifting up.
Two, three, four. Shoulders down.
Again. Concentrate. And...
Don't put your heel down.
- Don't put your heel down. - I didn't--
Stay on the toe. Just listen to me.
The steps aren't enough.
Feel the music.
It's not on the one. It's not the mambo.
It's a feeling, a heartbeat.
Don't try so hard.
Close your eyes.
Two, three, four. Two, three, four.
Breathe.
Head up. Lock your frame. Lock it.
Look, spaghetti arm.
This is my dance space. This is your dance space.
I don't go into yours. You don't go into mine. You gotta hold the frame.
Again.
Frame.
Back. Easy.
And turn, turn. Down. And lift. You'll learn that later.
And come on.
Down. Twist.
And the bow.
- Sorry. Sorry. - You trying to kill me?
You gotta concentrate! Is that your idea of fun?
As a matter of fact it is.
We do the show in two days, you won't show me lifts, I'm not sure of turns.
I'm doing all this to save your ass, but I'd rather drop you on it!
Let's leave.
Shit!
I locked the keys in the car!
You're getting wet, right?
- You're wild. - What?
You're wild!
Now, the most important thing to remember in lifts is balance.
Whoa! Whoa!
I got it now.
So where'd you learn to be a dancer?
Well, this guy came into this luncheonette one day and...
we were all sitting around doing nothing.
And he said that Arthur Murray was giving a test for instructors.
So, if you passed...
they teach you different dances, show you how to break them down, teach them.
What?
Good.
Don't look down. Look here. Good.
And...
Now, bend your knees and go up. Go, go.
Good try. Now, you'll hurt me if you don't trust me, all right?
Now, go, go. Go.
Good. Now, I'm gonna go up.
You know, the best place to practice lifts is in the water.
Just bend your knees. And... go.
Good.
Good. Good.
Now hold the position. Hold it.
Good. Don't break! Don't break!
Let's do it again.
All right. One, two, three.
Oh, sorry.
Good. Keep-- No, don't.
It's not too bad.
- One more time. - Okay. Over my head. Go.
I can't believe it's tonight.
Sheldrake's 20 minutes away. We'll change in the car.
Mrs. Schumacher. Hey, wait, we'll help you.
Such junk. Such junk.
Benny Bernstein's Dancing School, that's where I went.
George Burns was a teacher.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
I'll just keep my shoulders down, my head up...
my frame locked, stay on my toes...
What if I forget the steps?
Pull up, watch the frame. And remember, let him lead you.
I'm afraid I'm gonna forget to spike, get dizzy and fall on my face.
No. Don't look at my feet, keep my head up, my eyes open...
tension in my arms, my frame locked, seat pulled up...
Thanks, Baby.
I just want you to know that I don't sleep around...
whatever Robbie might have told you.
And I thought that he loved me.
I thought it was something special.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know that.
So, how does it look?
I'm scared.